What did YOU learn today?

Mom's Moment

Worshiping God, particularly on the Sabbath, is an interesting thing.  According to the world, it's an "extra" day we can use to play, shop, entertain, etc.  What does it mean to you?  Is it a day of "don'ts" or a day of "do's.  Here are some of the things we discussed in Relief Society today that we can DO:

1.  Attend ALL of your church meetings
2.  Visit someone who is sick, injured, elderly, or lonely
3.  Write your parents a letter
4.  Write to a missionary
5.  Send someone a thank you note
6.  Play religious music rather than your "regular" music
7.  Write in your journal
8.  Write a short story of a childhood experience (aka family history!)
9.  Dig into your genealogy.  Is it up to date?
10. Call extended family members
11.  Play the piano
12.  Invite someone to share dinner with you
13.  Take a treat to a friend or neighbor
14.  Call someone you didn't see at church
15.  Read your patriarchal blessing

A pastor was approached by a church member wanting to know why it was important to even go to church. Why couldn't he just think about God at home?  As they talked, sitting close to the fireplace, the pastor reached into the fire with some fire tongs, and pulled out a burning ember, placing it on the hearth away from the other coals.  As their discussion came to a close the pastor pointed out what had happened to the removed coal.  Away from the heat of the other embers, the solitary coal quickly lost its fire, smoldered, then became cold.

We, too, are like the coals of the fire.  We need the association we have with each other, particularly in the church setting, to help strengthen each other and gain "warmth" from those around us.

How is YOUR "coal" doing?  Is it giving heat to others by the way you worship God, or is it growing cold?  If we have a difficult time worshiping on Sunday, what are the REST of the days of the week like?

I hope this helps each of you THINK, and then DO things that will increase your Sabbath day worship!!

Love,
Madre

Brandon's Birthday. . .

Nothing like taking the elevator to the 19th floor of the Wells Fargo Building in Salt Lake City, then going through three different security doors, then quietly traipsing down a few more corridors, while breaking into a rousing version of "Happy Birthday to You" so that everyone in their cubicles could hear.  Many stood up for a better view, as we made our way to Brandon's work station.  It was great!  And he even turned a handsome shade of red!  His co-workers seemed to enjoy the commotion, AND his embarrassment!  So did we!!

Dallin Enters the MTC . . .

What an enjoyable day!!  Drove to Provo to take Dallin to the MTC...and then we drove to Salt Lake City to surprise Brandon for his 28th birthday!!



The MTC was great.  I LOVE the curb drop-off!!  It was nice to be up by the Provo Temple taking pictures, and then really enjoyed the "quick curbside meet n greet!"

Our Missionary Son

Tonight Dallin was set apart by President Richard Harris, along with Dad and Bishop Bunting, to be a full-time missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  Rather remarkable how time can fly one minute and stand still the next!

Wasn't it just yesterday that Dallin and Harrison Schram were laying side by side on our couch as infants only six weeks apart in age?  Suddenly they are young men, preparing to serve the Lord.

We drive up to Provo tomorrow morning.  Dallin enters the MTC a little after 1:00 p.m.  Fun and exciting times!!  We are SO happy for Dallin and the many wonderful experiences that lie ahead for him.

The Window. . .

I guess the window tells all kinds of stories at our house...here is just another part of the saga!!

I REFUSE to count the days, hours, or minutes that Dallin will be gone!  We will count in Christmases. thank you very much!!  And we're looking forward to hearing about many of the things our missionary son will be  experiencing.

We LOVED it when Brandon served in the Philippines, and likewise when Kristy served in Korea!  Missionary service is an amazing adventure, and a great learning experience as we get outside ourselves and truly serve others.

THE SPOON. . .

A midst everything else going on in preparing for Dallin leaving on his mission, I wanted to write about one of our greatest family memories:  THE SPOON!

The reason for writing about this now is because of a conversation I had with Jaimi the other day.  We were talking about the past few very trying days she has had with children:  smearing lotion all over this, dumping shampoo out all over that, using markers on things that should never have markers on them, etc., etc.
We talked about ways to discipline, talking with children, and parental patience.  I then asked Jaimi if she knew my philosophy behind the use of "the spoon."  She didn't.  And so, perhaps, you don't either.  Here is what you may have never known about "The Spoon."

Sometimes we grow up being disciplined in a way that was not "the best" and so we choose to repeat history, or to change it.  I opted to change it.  When Denzel was 2 1/2 years old, Dad swatted his bottom for something.  Denz, put his balled up fists on his hips and defiantly said, "SO, THAT DIDN'T HURT!"  I immediately thought, "Perhaps this is how parents learn to beat their children...'Well, then, I'll MAKE it hurt!'"  I did NOT want to ever go down that road.  I read a ton of parenting books, and talked to lots of people.

A wonderful lady I STILL think so much of taught me about "the spoon."  Here's how it works:

When a child is WILLFULLY disobedient - meaning he knows what he is doing is wrong and chooses to do it anyway - he gets disciplined with the spoon.  But there are strict guidelines.

First - the spoon has to be large and scary looking.

Second - the child must go get it himself out of the kitchen drawer (it helps to have it close where the children are familiar with it..."an ounce of prevention" simply by way of knowing it's there!)  While the child is retrieving the spoon, Mom has the opportunity to quickly review if she is DISCIPLINING or PUNISHING.  The spoon is a teaching tool, nothing else.

Third - Once the child brings the spoon, Mom asks the child to explain why he is getting a spank.  (If he has no idea why he is getting the spank, it's a punishment and not discipline.)  This conversation should be calm and instructive.  "Did you know you shouldn't do that?"  "What would have been a better choice?"  "Do you know I love you?"  "Will you try to make a better choice next time?"

Fourth - Many times, the fear of "the spoon" is all that is needed.  Occasionally, a very light tap may be beneficial.  Seldom, but sometimes, ONE little swat is instructive.

FIFTH - After the discipline, give a love to the child, and tell them you are sure they won't make that mistake again.  Then they get to go put the spoon away and go about their playing.

(This form of discipline stopped when each child turned 8 years old.  There were times that you wished you could get a swat rather than do the work, be grounded, or lose driving privileges, but that was the way Dad and I chose to handle things...)

Now, sometimes when I "feel badly" that maybe I wasn't a very good mother, I think back to all the times at dinner when "the spoon" becomes a source of conversation and laughter as you kids revel in your "remember when" stories.  I have to remind myself that "the spoon" must have done it's job:  it helped ME to calm down and not hit my children, and MY HAND was never associated with hitting or slapping.  (Well, once, right Brandon?)  AND that you laughed when you each received  your own SPOON as a Christmas gift two years ago!

I love each of you children SO very much.  I am excited to see you raise your families and pray for your peace and tranquility!!

"Family Vacation???"

Dal didn't get a "Family Vacation" at the end of his Senior year like all of the other kids because he had an incredible job opportunity making some VERY good money helping install turf back east.  Sooo, maybe our one-day trip to Las Vegas can kind of take the place of that. . . kinda!

 Before we left, Dallin put the finishing touches on the rock waterfall he "re-made" in our backyard.  We love it!  Then we headed south to Las Vegas.  It was a surprise for Erika since she had NO IDEA what our plans were...

 Our first stop was the Las Vegas Temple.  None of us had ever been there except for Dad, just after it had first opened many years ago.  Even though Dad had got the driving directions for the fastest way to get there,  he conceded to my assurance that "Heidi  TOLD me how to get there..."  It was the LONG way!  Oops!!

After walking around the temple grounds we headed to The Venetian Hotel where we parked.  Then walked partway to the M&M Factory before we realized we didn't have enough time...turned around and walked BACK to The Mirage (across the street from The Venetian) to see the Dolphin Exhibit.  Erika LOVES dolphins and it was a great surprise for her!  We loved it, too!

After lots of pictures and videos there, we walked a short distance to Treasure Island and Gilley's BBQ Restaurant.  It was really good and splitting dinner plates worked out nicely.  Lots of food, and not too expensive. . . then we walked back to The Venetian and Phantom of the Opera.  Yep!  Erika was surprised again!!  And we ALL loved the show!  An excellent performance all the way around, and we had really great seats too!  The entire day was perfect, we even hit a couple of the water shows at The Belagio as we walked back and forth to the M&M Factory.  What an incredible day!!  Hope these memories tide us over for two years!!

Dallin's Mission Preparations. . .

The last two weeks have been "interesting!"  Difficult, realizing that Dallin will be leaving for his mission soon, and that he will be gone for TWO YEARS!!   It did NOT help having Natalee move to Mapleton, Utah all at the same time, however she has a really good job in Provo working at Nexus Paincare.

Last year, after some mother/son "discussion" and not seeing everything eye-to-eye, we came to the agreement that it would be very beneficial to BOTH of us, for Dallin to give me a hug every 20 minutes to help ease some of the hurt and frustration I was feeling as he was exerting his independence.  He was very gracious about it all and would jokingly ask, "Do you need a '20 minute' hug?"  His friends thought it a bit weird, but Dallin always gave me great hugs before he left for BYU.  And those hugs have been even MORE important now.  He has been very accommodating of my needs.  I think it has helped him a bit, too!

 One of the mornings Rod and I picked a lot of tomatoes from our garden...just in time, too!  We had just opened out last jar of homemade salsa from last year!  And Dallin has always been good about helping make salsa . . . even though I did have to wake him up to come help!  What a good sport!!



More mission prep stuff. . .

One of the FUN things Dallin got to do was get some booster shots.  He was just SOOOO thrilled!

 We went to Salt Lake City for the Henry Grow Family Reunion being held on Temple Square the end of July.  We also went to the Jordan River Temple and did a session there.  The reunion was VERY cool!  There were 3,000 in attendance out of 9000 descendants.  It was pretty amazing to know that nearly everyone we passed was a "cousin!"




It was amazing for Rod and I to sing in the "Grow Tabernacle Choir" . . .  probably the closest thing we'll ever get to singing with The Mormon Tabernacle Choir!!  And it was fun to have some of the kids there with us, too!  We enjoyed dinner in the Conference Center "lobby"...feeding over 1200 people in a very short amount of time.  Brandon, Tannya and Nikki, plus Kristy were there with us.  Also, Linda, Monty, Cambria, Josh and Lynlee; Dan and Janet, Cory, Jessica, Deanna, Rebecca and Kyle were also there!  And then we headed back to the Tabernacle for the Grow Fireside.  But the highlight of the evening for ME was getting to play the Tabernacle organ after the fireside!!  TRULY Amazing experience!!  (Thanks, Ken Udy!)

Freakish July Rainstorm!!

We had just finished an enjoyable Sunday dinner, sent Kristy and Katie Olsen off "into the sunset..." as they headed back to SLC, and then the heavens unleashed a double whammy rainstorm, complete with hailstones at one point.

Dallin and Harrison LOVED running around in the first wave (no pun intended), and the 2nd wave was painful as the hailstones pelted their heads.

Sunset Blvd was closed off when it formed a small lake all the way across!  Pretty amazing stuff!!

RE-CALCULATING!!

Mom’s Moment

July 15, 2012

Have you ever noticed how a car GPS can be compared to our lives and the way we live them?  Well, neither did I until this morning when I heard the analogy on Music and The Spoken Word.

Think about it a minute.  When we are driving somewhere and we take a wrong turn, does the GPS shout, “YOU IDIOT!!  What were you THINKING!!  Now you’ll NEVER get there!”  No.  The GPS simply says in a matter-of-fact voice, “RE-CALCULATING…” and proceeds to find you an alternate route to get to your destination.  It might take you longer to go the “detour” sort of way, however, if you don’t stop driving, and follow the directions, you WILL eventually get there.

The same is true with life.  If you make a “wrong turn,” it isn’t the end of the world unless you give up.  The shouting in our head often says things like, “YOU IDIOT!!  WHY did you do that?  Now there’s NO HOPE for you!  You’ll never be able to fix THIS!  It’s the end of the road!” 

What we need to realize is that the TRUE GPS, also known as our Savior, Jesus Christ, is lovingly saying, “Re-calculating…just keep trying; don’t stop ‘driving’ just because you are in a rough patch because of taking a wrong turn.  Trust the directions; follow the course I’ve set, even if you stray from the most direct route, you can make it back to the presence of the Father because I have paid the price for every one of your detours.”

We need to remember that our experiences and choices do not define us.  They are the things that help us learn and grow.  We are given commandments to live by to help us know the most direct route, with the least amount of detours.  However, every road CAN lead back to our Heavenly Father IF we accept the Atonement of Jesus Christ, repent, and do what He has commanded us to do, whether it be from the beginning of our trip, partway through it, or close to the end. 

I hope, when we make mistakes, we will be a little kinder to ourselves.  Rather than condemning us, perhaps we should quietly remind ourselves that we are “RE-CALCULATING…”